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W W W. M A I N E B I Z . B I Z 9 M AY 1 9 , 2 0 2 5 Building your business? Talk to your neighbor. Since 1852, Bath Savings has been investing in the people, communities, and businesses that make Maine the place we're proud to call home. Our lenders are your neighbors — they shop in your downtown, coach your kids, volunteer in your community, and understand your local economy. Contact us today to learn more about custom lending solutions tailored to suit your needs. 1-800-447-4559 | bathsavings.bank MEMBER FDIC EQUAL HOUSING LENDER Becky Lizotte Principal, Doten's Construction James Perkolidis Vice President, Bath Savings A S K AC E A n s w e r e d b y J o h n O ' B r i e n The Association for Consulting Expertise (ACE) is a nonprofit association of independent consultants who value "success through collaboration." The public is welcome to attend its regular meetings to share best practices and engage with industry experts. For more information go to www.consultexpertise.com. Q: How can I handle rude colleagues? ACE advises: We live in tense times. Rude and uncivil behavior — especially at work — seems to be on the rise. In a 2022 Harvard Business Review article, Christine Porath reported that 76% of workers had witnessed or experienced incivility at work within the previous month. So, what can you do about inconsiderate colleagues? 1. Start with self-awareness: Consider how your own behavior might be perceived. Some reactions from coworkers may reflect how they feel treated by you. 2. Don't take it personally: If someone is uncharac- teristically short or irritable, the issue might not be about you at all. Your colleague may be frustrated by something else and blowing off steam. It may be better just to let it go. 3. Pause and breathe: Detach from the moment to gain perspective. Abdominal breathing or the "physiologi- cal sigh" (recommended by Huberman Lab) can help regulate stress and prepare you to respond calmly. 4. Address it directly — when appro- priate: If the behavior is more than a one-off, consider a private, respect- ful conversation. People often don't realize they've been offensive. Begin with concern: "Are you okay?" Use active listening and ask short, open- ended questions like "How so?" to encourage reflection. 5. Involve authority if needed: If the behavior is part of a pattern, seek guidance from a supervisor. Document specific examples if appropriate but be careful not to escalate by gossip- ing or excluding the colleague. It may be better to let your supervisor investigate whether the problem is widespread. A super- visor may also have a broader perspective and better tools to address the issue. W o r k i n g y o u r w a y through these steps will help you evaluate the size of the problem before tak- ing the next, more serious, action. The situation may sim- ply die down. If not, you know what to do next. ACE member John M. O'Brien is a professional speaker, executive coach and consultant who is the author of the recently released book, "Rudeness Rehab: Reclaiming Civility in the Workplace and Your Home Space." He can be reached at: john@activatesuccess.org Working your way through these steps will help you evaluate the size of the problem before taking the next, more serious, action.