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V O L . X X I X N O. X X I § 2 SEPTEMBER 18, 2023 8 SeniorSmart M any people have expe- rienced the feeling that everything at work will fall apart if they take a little time off. For caregivers responsible for the well-being of their loved ones or those of other people, time away may especially feel like an unafford- able luxury. Taking a break or engaging in an activity designed to bring per- sonal joy or fulfillment often comes with a sense of guilt. Caregivers may even find it hard to prioritize basic needs such as exercise, medical care or eating. It 's hard to enjoy regular get- togethers with friends, attending church, shopping, sleeping, reading or taking in a movie when these worthwhile activities come with a dose of guilt or shame. But without a breather or a little self-care, a caregiver can run the risk of harming their own physical and mental health, leading to depression or anxiety, which can affect their ability to adequately help those for whom they are caring. "Caregiving is physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting," says Dr. Cliff Singer, chief of the Center for Geriatric Cognitive and Mental Health and director of the Mood and Memory Clinic at Northern Light Acadia Hospital in Bangor. "A person whose personal resilience is depleted won't be as effective in giving the dependent person what they need in each of those three spheres. So caregivers need to recognize and respect their own limits when they are approaching the breaking point." A caregiver's burden doesn't just affect one area of life; the sustained stress can affect other responsibili- ties as well as relationships. Caregiv- ing can be a drag on time, personal development, physical health, social engagement and emotional well-being. "You have to put your own oxy- gen mask on first – the same applies when you're caring for someone with dementia or Alzheimer's," says Amy Angelo, program manager of the Alzheimer's Association's Maine chapter. "You will only have the patience and energy you need by taking care of yourself, otherwise you could be short-tempered, for- getful, and you wouldn't be show- ing up for the person in the best way you possibly could." Finally, don't underestimate the importance of a respite to the per- son for whom you are caring. ere is a good chance they need a break as much as you do. "A caregiver needs to feel able to put aside any feelings of shame or guilt in seeking out some respite," says Dr. Marc Kaplan, medical direc- tor at Saco-based behavioral health nonprofit Sweetser. "Many friends and family members will say, 'Please let me know if I can help in any way,' and it's up to the caregiver to actu- ally take them up on it." Creating care anywhere Here are some ways for caregivers to physically and mentally cope with the stress of their responsibilities: Plot a getaway Taking time away from caregiving is actually important to providing quality care for others. An exhausting task Self-care is vital when caring for others B y J . C r a i g A n d e r s o n S T O C K I L L U S T R AT I O N / V E C T O R M I N E Caregiving is physically, mentally and emotionally exhausting. — Dr. Cliff Singer